


Saluta Te Domum

by grexigone



Series: Eldur (Collection of One Shots and Prompts) [10]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Role Reversal, Angst, Angst and Feels, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, One Shot Collection, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Role Reversal, Short One Shot, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-21 18:33:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14920695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grexigone/pseuds/grexigone
Summary: ForJojowho asked me to do the entire "send me a ship" meme for Rebelcaptain.Long story short, I decided to be the Queen of Extra that I am and made a short drabble fics for each questions :P





	1. Books

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ivaylo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ivaylo/gifts).



> This is for the meme: **Who said “I love you” first**

Before Cassian even knew, it has become a habit: coming back from missions—long or short—or even just hours of meetings with restless councilmen and councilwomen, he would find Jyn, sprawled on his bed fully clothed safe for the boots and socks, lost in any book she’s currently reading. Her rank didn’t come with a separate quarter yet, so instead of taking the book, Jyn just spend hours and hours in his, filling the room with warmth he never thought he could have in this kind of life.

(He wasn’t quite sure what this whole ‘relationship’ thing is, but Cassian had translated it into actually wanting to return alive from missions to see her, being in a certain mood when she’s not around for too long, and the grounding feeling from knowing that for whatever he is, Jyn Erso would never leave him.)

He only smiled when she didn’t reply his greeting, before shedding all of his outer clothes and climbed onto the bed next to her, flicking an eye at the page she’s currently reading before staring at her serious face.

_Force, she is beautiful. Have I told her that before?_

“Have you read this?” Jyn’s high pitched voice was followed with a quick turn of her head to glare at him, mouth gaped and eyes widened in utter shock. “ _She’s not really dead, right?_  Wait, don’t tell me. I want to read it myself.”

In a split second, her gaze returned to the book, and Cassian could only raised an eyebrow and smiled at that. This is Jyn’s idea of relaxing, while his, well, his was enjoying her. And he could never thank the universe enough for the chance to know her better like this, like now.

“Gods, this one’s so good! I love the mystery and-”

“And I love you,” the words slipped before Cassian realized it. As Jyn slowly turned and held her gaze to him, he started questioning how could none of them ever said it before, this simplest truth. But just as his mind switched to his intelligence deducting mode, Jyn’s eyes softened and she grinned before moving forward to plant one, languid kiss to his lips.

“Same to you, Captain,” she whispered after pulling away.

It ended too soon, so Cassian pulled her back in.


	2. Takeaway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For meme: **Who surprises the other in the iddle of the day at work with lunch**

The sound of familiar footsteps immediately broke Cassian’s focus on whatever part of the U-wing he’s been working on to look up at the source of the welcomed interruption. It was none other but Jyn Erso, of course, returning from one of her solo missions on schedule, and—as quick as his eyes could scan—unharmed. A strange wave of relief spread through Cassian’s body as quick as his guts turned upside down when their gazes met and Jyn threw one of those smiles that she seemed to only give to him.

“Hey, Bodhi,” Jyn tore her eyes away and raised one hand to mimic the young pilot sitting behind Cassian.

If he was to be honest, he almost forgot that Bodhi was even _there_ in the first place.

“Hey, Captain,” she stopped just outside Cassian’s personal space and stood with both hands behind her back, the smile widening just a bit while he tried to keep a flat expression at the teasing tone Jyn was using on his rank.

“Hey…uh…” Cassian absentmindedly toyed with the parts on his hands, tossing it from one hand to the other in a desperate attempt to retain his composure, “How’s your mission?”

“Not enough to keep the adrenaline running, but anyway,” Jyn shifted her weight to another foot and awkwardly pointed at the sky before bringing her hand back down, “It’s midday.”

Cassian raised an eyebrow, unsure of where she was going with this, despite his skills in Intelligence. “Yes it is.”

“Which means it’s lunch time, so…here you go!”

In one quick move, Jyn shoved a rustling-sounded stuff a bit too forcefully into Cassian’s arms, knocking out the ship parts out of his hands and onto a clattering mess on the hangar’s ground. He grabbed the (apparently) paper bag to stop it from also falling before lifting it up to examine the content.

“What is this?” Cassian asked tentatively- not only had he hadn’t seen paper bags in years, but he also couldn’t remember which planets still produced and used them. In front of him, Jyn was toying with the hem of her vest, not meeting his eyes and instead fixating on the bag as she shrugged.

“For you.”

“Which is…?”

Another shrug. “Food.”

“Food?” Confused, Cassian responded with the only word he could came up with. “ _But…why?_ ”

“Why not?” Jyn replied, finally meeting his eyes with a rather challenging look as if expecting him to laugh at her. But what she saw instead must’ve been quite sincere because a second later her expression turned soft and she took one step closer to push the paper bag once again to Cassian’s chest.

“I just…I know you haven’t eaten any lunch because, let’s face it, you never eat anyway, so...” Jyn didn’t finish her words, choosing to tap on the bag instead.

A long list of questions whirred inside Cassian’s mind by now, starting with another “Why?”, but seeing that his hesitation had prompted Jyn to pull on the zipper of his vest a bit too strongly, he decided to finally take a look at the contents of the bag.

It was just an ordinary, medium-sized tin box inside, but when he pulled it out to have a better look, Cassian found spotted a small, hand-drawn logo that looked somewhat familiar—

“Wait, is this…?” his eyes widened when the memories clicked, “This is the logo from that restaurant in Togoria!” Shooting Jyn with an incredulous look, Cassian only half-noticed how she shoved both of hands into her back pocket and tilting her head to hide the colors blooming on her cheeks, all the while remembering the Festian cantina he spotted a few months back during a recon mission.

It had stopped Cassian in his tracks. All his childhood memories flooded his mind as he glanced the menu painted on the cantina’s glass window. It brought him back to Fest, sitting at the Andor family dinner table while waiting for his mother to bring in dishes smelling exactly like the aroma he caught just behind the cantina doors.

And of course Jyn had noticed that he stopped, but the memories left him so overwhelmed he couldn’t remember what words were exchanged when Jyn doubled back to talk to him about it.

Until now.

But then another thought clicked in Cassian’s mind, and he immediately turned his gaze back to Jyn.

“Hold on,” he squinted. “You were supposed to go to Arbra for your mission.”

“Oh, I didn’t know you were checking on my mission files,” Jyn shot back, the corner of her lips turned upward for a split second in a smirk, “But yeah, I went to Arbra. We stopped at Togoria for fuel.”

“You should’ve had enough fuel to get there and back; it’d already been calculated.”

“Well, something happened and we ran out of fuel, so we had to recharge at Togoria.”

“Wha—have you reported back to Draven about this? That shouldn’t happen, it’s too dangerous to went off course like that, Jyn, I suggest—“

“Yes, yes, it won’t happen again,” Jyn waved her hand in front of her and jutted her chin at the lunch box. “So, are you going to eat or you always this fussy before lunch?”

A renewed list of questions started filling his mind, but knowing how Jyn dealt with disciplinary speeches, Cassian toss them all out, and—still eyeing suspiciously between the dish in his hands and his favorite greens—he pulled at the two small latches of the box’s cover for yet another surprise.

Cassian looked up at Jyn ever so slowly, his eyebrows knotted as he caught her trying to temper down a grin.

“How did you know I like this dish?”

She shrugged again, “You stared at the name the longest,”

More out of habit, Cassian’s first thought immediately went to, _Shit, I let myself lose my composure—a sign of weakness_ , before another, more important realization interrupted his train of thought.

“You were watching me?”

He swore he could see Jyn’s face change color almost as fast as her eyes widened at his deduction, but before Cassian could add anything, she stepped back and rolled her eyes exaggeratedly.

“Of course I did, you seemed like you just saw a ghost—look, I have no time for this interrogation, so,” Jyn backed away slowly, her cheeks stained with a slight pinkish shade. “Bodhi! Make sure he eats that and report back to me, okay?”

“Sure will, Sergeant!” The pilot’s response came almost too quick and it jolted Cassian so much that he cracked his neck from turning around too fast. But by the time he turned back around to thank her, Jyn was already gone.

“You know,” Bodhi spoke up after Cassian took a seat beside him, still staring at the food but now secretly enjoying its new association with Jyn, “Togoria and Arbra located in different rims. Weird choice to stop for fuel, don’t you think?”

 _It was indeed a weird choice_ , he mused. But, then again, Jyn's displays affection were never  _really_  conventional to begin with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to [Char](https://sleepykalena.tumblr.com/) for helping with the story ideas!
> 
> Find me also on [Tumblr](https://grexigone.tumblr.com/)!


	3. Late

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For meme: **Who would've the other's picture as their phone background**

Cassian pressed his thumb just a little harder on the datapad he’s holding, half hoping that the pressure will change the information displayed on the blue screen—or at least it will help match the drumming of his heart to his steady footsteps.

“Senator Mothma,” Draven’s voice could be heard even before Cassian reached the door to the Command Room, and there was something in his superior’s tone that required him to take a deep breath before entering the room.

And he was right to do so.

“I regret to report that Sergeant Jyn Erso went missing behind enemy lines on Lothal.”

He gritted his teeth and approached Draven, watching with unfocused eyes how the words translated into coded transmission.

“Reconnaissance has proven impossible, so as a result, I must declare Sergeant Erso as having been Killed in Action. Send that and please try to reach Admiral Raddus again for me, Corporal.”

The assigned person nodded. Cassian then handed the datapad to Draven, which he put away without even looking at its contents.

“The last surveillance report is back, sir,” Cassian reported, insistent while maintaining a calm, trained tone. “No sign of activity.”

Draven squinted his eyes at Cassian before tapping at the comm staff’s back, “Go get a cup of caf, Corporal.”

“Yes, sir.”

The general used the borrowed time to circle the round table currently displaying data of Lothal before he stopped right across Cassian and glared at him.

“I know you’re not working alone on this, Captain, but I can’t possibly drag the Princess and General Syndulla in. But that doesn’t mean you can just get away with both of them on your back.”

“With all due respect, sir,” Draven blinked at the speed in which Cassian responded, “I don’t regret my decisions, and I don’t think Jyn—Sergeant Erso did either.”

He could almost laugh at how foolish he might’ve sounded at the moment, but Cassian didn’t care. Jyn might be difficult for other people, but after going through hell and back with her on their fateful mission on Scarif—to understand why she is the way she is from those rare moments where she opened herself more to him than to anyone else— Cassian could only see himself in Jyn. Probably the best version of him, the one not restricted with rules and the bureaucracy of the Rebel Alliance. And, having found his own mirror through her, Cassian could proudly say that he understands (and appreciates) her more and more each day.

Draven scoffed. “What makes you think your personal opinion mattered in this situation? I took a chance with Jyn Erso and Rogue One, Andor- one that I keep reconsidering day after day. And now one of Rebellion’s Heroes and a bunch of other good soldiers are dead because, apparently, you had a crush!”

“With all due respect, _sir_ ,” Cassian shot back, trying to ignore the heat spreading through his face and neck at the last word, “It wasn’t that. I had hope.”

“Bah!” The general waved his hand in frustration before resting both to his hips, eyeing Cassian top to bottom as if surprised by how much he’d changed. Again, Cassian knew he sounded ridiculous, but at least he was saying something he’d never brave enough to let out in the open before.

Yes, he was hopeful. It’s what kept him going, doing whatever deeds the Rebellion wanted him to do. It’s what he sacrificed his entire life for- he had hope that whatever they did, whatever _he_ did, was meant for something greater than himself, for the peace of the galaxy. But at this point, it wasn’t the faces of all the ghosts from Cassian’s nightmares that came to mind—the ghosts he’d given permission to haunt him because there was no such thing as redemption for people like him—but rather Jyn’s face, when he opened the door to his quarters for her in the middle of the night, just 3 days prior.

“There isn’t going to be any rescue mission, is there?” she whispered between short breaths, obviously winded from running over after coming into such a conclusion. Cassian had opened his mouth to lie—more out of instinct than for comfort, but Jyn then stepped closer into his personal space and with their distance reduced, she looked at him with those greens that demand only the truth.

“When you asked me to stay,” Jyn whispered, one hand grabbing his wrist and squeezing it gently, “You said it’s because I was meant for more. Do you still believe that?”

 _She was, and always will be_.

“Every word,” Cassian replied without hesitation, and, to his surprise, she smiled.

“Now I’m going to do something real stupid, and definitely unsanctioned: I’m going to bring Baze, Chirrut, and Bodhi back. I just need to know,” Jyn gave his wrist another squeeze. “Are you with me?”

Before she even asked for it, Cassian already knew what his answer would be: “All the way.”

“Well,” Draven’s voice cut Cassian back into the present like a vibroblade and as the general turned his back on him, Cassian reached to his pocket to give a gentle squeeze on Jyn’s kyber stored inside it. “I _hope_ that’s a big comfort to you when they decided to finally decommissioned Rogue One for good—what in the kriff is going on out there?”

Following Draven’s gaze, Cassian turned around just in time to see a bunch of Rebel pilots in their orange uniforms running and shouting outside the Command Room, followed by waves after waves of people. After meeting their eyes for a brief moment, both men decided to follow suit, walking fast towards the hangar where the crowds has been gathering. Cassian felt the kyber in his pocket warming up, his heart started drumming once again against his ribcage because _please, please, please tell me it’s Jyn; tell me she’s safe and she comes back home, and—_

“Hey! Let’s hear it for Sergeant Erso!”

The crowd broke into cheers and whistles and claps as finally, just finally, Cassian spotted the small figure of Jyn Erso walking away from the ramp of yet another stolen Imperial ship followed by the exhausted face of Baze Malbus, the calming smile of Chirrut Imwe, and the please-give-me-my-bed face of Bodhi Rook (one of the lens of his goggles was cracked but was otherwise unharmed). Behind them was another bunch of rescued Rebels, and soon enough the small circle was filled with tearful reunion.

And then, just like that, just like it always has been, Cassian’s eyes met with Jyn’s. It was all chaos of Rebels shouting and cheering and rambling around her. It was probably half people on the base running, but they found each other. Cassian didn’t know who moved first or who was approaching who, but in less than 10 steps Jyn was within his reach, her eyes lit and lips quirked up into a half smile, and, to prevent a collision, they both slid subtly to their left, creating a familiar circle he knew too well.

Cassian didn’t know how long he just stared at her, drinking her sight in, all while his heartbeat threatened to break from his rib cage because she looked impossibly _beautiful_.

“You’re late,” he finally got out.

Jyn’s smile widened, and she tilted her head towards the stolen ship, “Couldn’t find my ride.”

He should’ve really, _really_ asked about how she got a hand on the Imperial freighter, or whether she had already cleared it of any trackers, or any of the several other questions buzzing in his mind, but all Cassian could do at the moment was smile back.

That is, until Jyn’s gaze fixed to someone behind him and her expression returned to a neutral state. “I suppose I have to answer to someone.”

He turned around to see Draven staring unimpressed at both of them and huffed a laugh when their eyes met again.

“Unfortunately yes.” Cassian offered her a playful smirk. “And you better have a very good excuse because I’ve tried my best and it didn’t work.”

“Hmm.” Jyn squinted, and one hand flung to her pants pocket to pull out a small holo-projector and placed it over her opened palm. “What if told you I also happened to save his best Intelligence agent’s ass?”

With a press of a button, the holo lit up to reveal Cassian’s own image—or rather, a bust of him, dressed in an Imperial uniform, complete with its rank badge, and a warning in Aurabesh circling below it. A quick read revealed ‘Joreth Sward’ was mentioned.

“Someone had been gathering information about your alias. Luckily, I stumbled into his room while he was one step away from transmitting this to the Imperial fleet,” Jyn said with a shrug, as if stopping it from happening was a side job she’d been doing every day.

“ _Sergeant Erso!_ ” Draven bellowed across the hangar; his patience was already running very thin, and it dissipated any proper response Cassian could come up with. Turning off the holo, Jyn gave him a final nod before straightening her back and prepared to walk towards the general. _There will be time to catch up…later_ , Cassian told himself, fighting the strange urge to grab her wrist and tell her exactly what he felt about her.

But before Jyn walked too far, he was reminded of something else and called her back.

She turned around.

“I believe you need your kyber back?” he offered.

After a beat, Jyn smiled. “You can keep that for a while,” she replied, starting to back away from him. “In exchange, I’ll keep this holo. You know, for safety reasons.”

 

In spite of that agreement, Cassian let her keep the holo long after he’d returned her necklace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, special tengs to [Char](https://sleepykalena.tumblr.com/) for beta-ing this ficlet!
> 
> So....I _was_ thinking of making this a simpler story where Cassian put Jyn's photo as background of his phone simply because he missed her BUT I kinda feel like I didn't want to do a modern AU for this one :P
> 
> Also, I've been thinking about this scene from Captain America a lot and I really wanna put it into a fic so TA DA! Here it is!
> 
> Enjoy, and come say hi to me on [Tumblr](https://grexigone.tumblr.com/)!


	4. Someday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As days go by and fade to nights // I still question why you left  
> I wonder how it didn't work out // But now you're gone and memories all I have for now  
> But no, it's not over // We'll get older, we'll get over  
> We'll live to see the day that I hope for // Come back to me, I still believe that 
> 
> We'll get it right again // We'll come back to life again  
> We won't say another goodbye again // You'll live forever with me  
> Someday, someday, we'll be together  
> Someday, someday, we'll be together
> 
> I heard someday might be today // Mysteries of destinies  
> They are somehow and are someway // For all we know they come tomorrow  
> For today my eyes are open // My arms are raised for your embrace  
> My hands are here to mend what is broken // To feel again to walk on the face
> 
> I believe there is more to life // Oh, I love you much more than life itself  
> I believe I can change your mind // Revive what is dying inside  
> And someday, someday, we'll be together  
> Someday, someday, we'll be together
> 
>  
> 
> \- _Someday_ , John Legend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For meme: **Who asks who if they can join the other in the shower**
> 
> a.k.a the (indirect?) continuation of the role reversal AU fic I made months ago, [Fire Meet Gasoline](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14219397)! Thank you so so much for everyone who has commented on the fic; this piece here happened because of all your feedbacks! I'm still smiling like a drunken horse whenever I read them all, and I really hope that you guys enjoy this one too!
> 
> Thank you and apologies (?) for [Jojo](http://crazy-fruit.tumblr.com/) because I'm using your prompt for some personal works :""") Still 8 stories to go, so bear with me! :P

Cassian was being followed.

There were three of them, so far, with the first one shadowing him since he took a sharp turn from the main street into a narrow alley. There rest were not so subtle, not even trying to put some effort on blending in with their surroundings; all big muscles and grim faces in between crowds of barely-nourished, working class inhabitants of the mining town.

He took another sharp turn, this time into a dimly lit dead end that should take him to the exact opposite of where he’s staying. One last peek through his shoulder was enough to make sure that the number of stalkers didn’t increase, though Cassian was confident enough should the group increase to six. He calculated his steps- _if I could just get through this tonight, it’ll be another successful mission and no visit to med bay_. Plus, they appeared to be merely local thugs looking for credits to scrape instead of information to sell to the Empire. _Focus, and you’ll be home before you even know it_.

Or so he thought, until he was welcomed with a cold, hard barrel, pressing into the exact spot where his heart pounded underneath his clothes.

 _Oh kriff, there were actually four_.

Cassian grit his teeth as the rest of the gang quickly surrounded him from all sides, waiting patiently, while the one with the blaster aimed at him wheezed out their demands in their native language. The aggressor was near-human, judging from their odd features, and certainly not native to this planet. He held out both hands into the air, displaying his most innocent face of ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’; all while ignoring the increased tone of the aggressor to focus on the micro-movements of his surroundings.

The near-human poked Cassian with the blaster end, clearly annoyed by the calmness contrary to his drumming heartbeat. The rest took one step closer, but their unsteady breathing was enough to give him clues on their skill. He might have an upper hand in this, but the only thing that needs to be done first is--

A red bolt flashes on his right.

The thug behind him fell with a heavy thud.

 _Now!_ A voice on Cassian’s head screamed, and he used the time it took for the remaining thugs to frantically look around to duck low and push his shoulder as hard as he could to the left one’s chest, knocking the air out of their lungs, before swirling on his heels to hide behind the right one. A white blaster bolt flashes on the space where his head had been, but Cassian was quicker, and the second, frantic shot immediately hit the thug he’d been using as shield.

Cassian only had a split second to see a dark shadow fall down from the sky, which distracted the near-human, before spotting the Left Thug, who was back on their knees and began to charge at him. He swerved to his left, easily dodging the uncalculated punch, and landed a quick jab to their exposed waist, before giving them another hit on the temple, knocking them unconscious.

He then turned around quickly--so quick that his neck made a low cracking noise--to check on the last thug, with the blaster. But that was only part of the reason; Cassian turned because somehow his heart raced faster than it should, because somehow, against his logic, he thought he knew what, or _who,_ to expect.

He looked just in time: the last thug was trying to reach for his fallen blaster when a flash of metal came into contact with its femur, causing them to scream in agony. And before it could even attract too many people to the sound, another whip from what Cassian eventually identified as a truncheon clashed with the thug’s face, and the they fell unceremoniously onto the dusty street.

And then he saw her, because _of course_ it was her.

Neither of them move; they just stare at each other from a safe distance, and for a few seconds Cassian felt impossibly numb from all the emotions flowing into his body. He wanted to run, wanted nothing but to reach and touch her to make sure that she’s real, but the invisible wall created by a whole year of absence from each others’ life suddenly thickened, enough to force him to stop.

Across him, she was breathless and feral, eyes blazing dangerously and fixed to his, behind the loose hair that always framed her small face. Cassian’s first instinct was to interpret what the stone cold expression might be saying: Does she want him to leave? Is she going to attack him for this--for taking the precious free time he got to look for her? But before the list of questions could go even longer, her face changed, and he heard it, too:

Footsteps. Synchronized.

‘Troopers.

She flashed him an annoyed look before muttering, “Follow me,” and, as quickly as she came, she disappeared into a small turn previously unseen due to the near-human’s huge stature.

Cassian followed her through streets and alleyways, keeping a comfortable distance just outside her personal space not just out of safety, but also because of a strong, distant feeling that seemed to radiate around her--something he hadn’t felt, especially from her, in a long time. The last time he sensed this from her was just before taking off for their first mission together, at the hangar on Yavin IV.

 _Trust goes both ways_ , he once said to her, even after being caught red-handed stealing her blaster. Cassian didn’t really think too hard on those words back then--it was merely easy banter he was finally able to use, since it would have otherwise gotten him in trouble or at worst, kissed by the butt of some ‘Troopers’ rifle back in the labor camp. And yet, somehow, she took it to heart and let him keep his first trophy. She trusted him, led him. Him- a criminal plucked out of Wobani, someone that could easily shoot her and cut and run and flee for good.

She didn’t turn to check on him as they continued walking, nor did she steal a glance to make sure he was following her, but there was a visible stiffness in her shoulders and her overall figure, and it hurt him (more than Cassian could allow himself to imagine) that his presence might be the reason for it. But despite all that, he was glad that she was alive and whole and _there_. She was still wearing her usual bun, though the loose hair framing her face seemed longer and her clothes had faded significantly from their original colors.

Watching her like this, merely steps away in front of him, Cassian was suddenly struck by the realization of how _often_ she let him watch her back. She was always facing away from him, looking ahead, leading him, opening ways for him. On more than one occasion she was even _dragging_ him, pulling him away from the mirage that was his father on the holo, presented to him by the illusion that was man who raised him like a second father. He didn’t want to be dragged away, not when he finally got to see the last remnants of his family, but the cave on Jedha was quickly crumbling, and there she was, her back towards him, dragging him away to flee the imploding desert. Cassian wasn’t sure when or where or even how it happened, but he soon found himself feeling comfort at the sight of her back on him, of her leading- it was an unspoken promise of going all the way together no matter what the galaxy may have thrown at them.

And yet…

She was still in the middle of her current mission, her current alias, just like Cassian himself, and that meant he had to keep pretending that they were strangers, not two people that nearly died in each other’s arms. But with her walls so high and the invisible distance between them so wide, a small part of his brain (or heart?) worried, against his beliefs and experiences, that she could easily disappear at any time, leaving him alone yet again. He was so paranoid by the idea that he couldn’t let his eyes wander away from her for more than five minutes.

And if he didn’t know her better, he would start memorizing the path she was leading him down, a sly hand readying the blaster hidden under his parka.

They eventually arrived at a shady motel, and it was only then that she stopped to turn around and wait for him, under the shadows of the entrance. Her face remained impassive, and she stormed off again as soon as Cassian had closed their gap enough. She led him to the third floor, then to the third door from the stairs, where she pushed in the passkey to a rusty metal door with numbers he didn’t even care to remember. She gestured for him to enter first so he did, Jyn following soon after, and the door swished closed, letting the deafening silence warp around them both inside the dimly lit room.

Cassian scanned the area in one look: he noted the dirty window with a view to the city, a ‘fresher, and a single, wood-framed bed, the only furniture inside the cramped room. An Alliance-standard duffel bag lay unzipped in one corner, revealing some clothes and jackets and Force knows what else to keep her warm.

Soon enough the silence became unbearable and he had to say something, Cassian knew, but once again she beat him to it.

“It’s better that you stay here for tonight,” she said flatly, brushing his arm lightly as she walked towards the duffel and started collecting her things. “The place you’re staying at now, it’s not safe enough. Honestly, Cassian, after all these times, I expect more of you.”

The words cut through him like a vibro-blade, and for the first time in _years_ , he felt anger bubbling inside his chest because she was _leaving_.

“What are you doing?” he asked suspiciously, watching as she kept shoving more and more things in the bag with her back towards him. The subsequent sound of zipping felt annoyingly loud, and when she finally turned around and faced him, expression remained impassive.

“I believe you can see that there’s not enough room for two in this _humble_ place,” she pulled the duffle over one shoulder. “Besides, it’s too risky for me to be seen with someone, let alone another undercover Rebel. I’m sure you can understand that.”

She fixed him one final look, then straightened up and walked past him again. The anger in him exploded, and Cassian gripped her elbow firmly, strong enough that she stopped and glared at the point of contact, then up at him with equally angry eyes.

“ _Jyn,_ ” he said through gritted teeth, ignoring the pleasant sensation of being able to say her name out loud again after all this time. “What are you doing?” he asked again, more demanding than before.

“Let go,” she whispered dangerously. Cassian shook his head and tightened his grip instead and, knowing that she could easily incapacitate him at any time now, he took one deep breath and blurted out the question that’s been haunting him:

“Why are you running away from me?”

Despite her best effort, Cassian could see the small twitch on the corner of her lips, and the arm on his hand stiffened.

“Not everything is about you, Cassian,” Jyn sneered and jerked her head, already pulling away from him. He released her arm only to grip on her wrist in exchange, yanking it so that she spun around and stood face to face with him, so that he could stare straight into the eye of the storm.

“Then why are you doing this to yourself?” Cassian demanded again, raising his tone just a little bit. “Why are you punishing yourself like this and...and running away _like a coward_?”

Jyn roared, and in a split second she had him against the wall, his back crashing hard into the metal with a bang as the duffel fell into the floor. Cassian grunted when she gripped the collar of his jacket and yanked him up, causing his head to clash with the wall. Her elbows pushed at his ribs, knocking all the air out.

“Go ahead,” he wheezed breathlessly, staring right into her blazing green eyes, “Hurt me, kill me if you have to, if it helps you feel better for what _we_ have done together. For what we achieved. _Together._ ”

“You have no right...” Jyn tightened her grips and yanked him, her voice so dangerously low with every word she got out, “You have no idea what--”

“You think it didn’t haunt me?” Cassian roared back, one hand turned into a fist and banged the wall out of frustration because _if only, if only he could tell her how her absence made the nightmares worse, how betrayed he felt because she left, because he thought they would die together on that beach but they hadn’t- he was still here but she had long since left_.

“It was _my_ father who built it, Jyn,” he banged the wall, trying to fight of water on his eyes, “A whole planet was gone because of him, and if you think for one second I didn’t think of all the lives that should have been saved--if you think I care about them less than you, or about all those people that _we_ led to Scarif, then you are wrong!”

“Do I?” Jyn blurted out, “That’s _exactly_ your problem, Cassian. You think you know everything, you think you know _me_ , but you haven’t seen what I’ve seen, and...I left because it’s my duty. Because I’m part of something bigger, and because I want to make sure that their deaths weren’t for naught!”

Cassian could see that the fire in Jyn’s eyes was reduced, but there was no stopping now, at least for him. He was tired, _too_ tired, and _Force, he missed her_.

“By taking on this assignment?” he hissed. “You think I don’t know the reason why you keep taking the longest, most dangerous missions ever since they released you from medbay? If guilt is what you’re feeling then you’re not alone, Jyn, I’m just…”

He shut his eyes tightly, trying desperately to calm all the emotions pouring out unfiltered because it was getting to be too much. He never thought he would able to let it all out, not with his heart threatening to break through his ribs and his ears deafening, but again, it’s been too kriffing long. He could feel the grip on his collar loosening, and the pressure on his chest shifted, allowing him to feel warmth where Jyn had curled her fingers on the fabric.

“Just… _please_ ,” he sighed into her hair because she’d hid her face by looking down at their boots, “Jyn, don’t shut me out like this.”

She still didn't look up like Cassian desperately wanted her to, so he took one brave move and put his hands up to cover hers. Jyn flinched at the contact, eventually staring at their hands like a wounded animal with her chest heaving visibly.

“All the way,” he murmured softly, reminding her of their promise to fight together. He wanted nothing but to hold her and make her stay, because he knew as soon as the conversation stopped, Jyn would slip away again.

She finally looked up to him then, her greens met his browns, the moment lasting only seconds but felt like forever. They both felt exhausted from the outburst, their first conversation in a whole year. Jyn swallowed visibly, her gaze moved around his face as if mapping and memorizing every line like she had almost forgotten them.

Cassian let her.

She didn’t pull her hands from under his, so he started stroking his thumbs over her skin, releasing the breath he didn’t realize he was holding to let her know that he was enjoying this, enjoying their reunion no matter how unexpected it was, or how tense it had become.

When she was done scanning her eyes across his face, Jyn’s expression shifted and she looked towards the door, and Cassian’s heart lurched down to his stomach.

“You should watch your back, Cassian,” Jyn said, taking one step behind. “I can’t keep saving your ass like that. You got lucky this time, you were given this chance. But one day your chances will be spent,” she’s pulling her hands away and out of his personal space.

“I didn’t ask you to,” Cassian replied quickly, already surging forward to chase her. “Jyn--”

“Don’t.” She stopped him with one stern look, her left foot bumping against the duffel on the floor that seemed to be eager to be picked up. He held out a hand, but Jyn kept hers at her sides.

 _No no no_. “Jyn…”

“Please don’t ask of me what I shouldn’t give to you, Cass.”

“... _stay_.”

“Oh, kriffing hell!”

She looked away, turning entirely away from him--again. Cassian swallowed hard, waiting for her next move because he’d never seen her like this before, so unsure and small and her walls raised up even higher than before. His mind was racing, knowing that whatever he said next had to be strong but not so _aggressively_ that it would scare her away.

But then Jyn glanced at him over her shoulder and her eyes were already wet with unshed tears, and-

“Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to... _see you_ there and not approach you the first chance I got?”

It was all Cassian needed to hear and he broke down, surging forward to reach her and spin her around, bringing his hands to her cheeks and pulling her to him, letting their lips crash together, letting the longingness pour out. Cassian shut his eyes tight, focusing only on the physical sensations, how _Jyn_ felt under his palms and, oh, how she felt like home and everything that had been missing from his life over the past year.

He could feel Jyn going stiff for a second before she melted into him, her hands instinctively grabbing his waist for purchase as she finally opened up to him, standing on her tiptoe to deepen the kiss and pressing their bodies even closer to each other. He wanted to laugh as their tongues and teeth clashed because _of course_ they would fight for control, and Cassian let her have it this time because he missed this so damn much.

Jyn took one step forward, then another, pushing him with her entire body until his back hit the wall once again, and he could feel all his blood rushing down to his groin while the small voice at the back of his mind repeatedly screamed for her name. And from the way Jyn kissed him, he knew she felt similarly. The sensation was too much but not enough at the same time, and Cassian practically growled as he kissed her over and over again.

“I missed you,” Jyn whispered into his mouth when they pulled away to catch their breaths, leaning their foreheads against each other’s as if they couldn’t bear to be apart for too long. “So damn much.”

“Come home with me,” he pleaded, opening his eyes to find her already looking at him with his favorite green shade that he missed so much. Cassian stroked her cheeks gently with his thumbs, and he went breathless for a moment when she closed her eyes again and lean into his touch, _finally_ enjoying the contact.

“I can’t,” Jyn breathed out when their gazes met again. It was a childish request and he knew it, but still; he was done with hiding his own feelings.

“Then stay with me tonight?”

She didn’t answer, at least not in words. Instead, Jyn kissed him again, more intensely than before, and Cassian let himself melt under her lips. She was still pinning him against the wall, and after planting one long, searing kiss on him, she pulled away, waiting patiently until he opened his eyes, until he could see the the need in there that she no longer cared to hide anymore. Cassian let go of her face, letting his hands fall carelessly to his sides as an invitation because as much as he wanted her, he also wanted this night to be about her, to let her have him in any way she wanted, to prove that “all the way” was not an empty promise.

Jyn took the cue and stepped closer, her hands moving ever so lightly to the zipper of his parka and pulling it down tentatively. Her eyes never left his as she continued undressing him, shedding the fabric one by one in gentle motions that betrayed the fire in her own eyes until he was down to his skin and his clothes were but a useless pile on the floor.

Even though it wasn’t the first time they’ve seen each other bare like this, Cassian still found himself fighting the urge to cover his body. He shut his eyes tightly instead, because watching Jyn slowly drag her gaze on him from bottom to top suddenly felt like too much exposure. _You are being stupid_ , he told himself, and a hint of embarrassment started to bloom from the heat on his face. Taking a deep breath, he forced his eyes to open again, and when he did, he found her staring at him with softness he’d never seen before, and it almost made him choke on his emotions.

“Come here,” Jyn murmured, outstretching her hand while she backed towards the bed, the duffel left forgotten on the floor. Cassian followed her lead; _Anywhere, anytime_ , he wanted to tell her but he chose to stay quiet instead. Once they were close enough to the bed, she spun them around, fingers still intertwined, and moved forward until he hit the bed frame with the back of his knees. Lifting her free hand, Jyn ran her palm across his cheek, temple, stroking the hair she could reach, before resting it on his nape and pull him down for another searing kiss.

She was a thing of beauty, Cassian thought, hoping that the galaxy could see what he saw of her while feeling grateful for the rare opportunity to know her better. He couldn’t help but think about how they first met, the night they spent together--how she made him feel then ( _like home_ , he remembered longingly) and how he wished, day after day, that he had turned around sooner.

“Undress me,” he heard Jyn whisper, breaking his train of thought, and he immediately obeyed. Cassian could feel her watching his every movement intently, switching between gazing at his face and his admiring his handiwork. Despite having done this before, heat spread across his face and neck, and sweat started to break out on his palms. He forced himself to be patient- _you have all the time in the world, even just one night_ , he reminded himself- because right now he just wanted to rip the damn shirt off her and make love to her like there was no tomorrow, but again-

_She’s here, and you have time._

He intentionally left her breast band last, then surged down to kiss her, igniting the dormant fire within them by nibbling at her lower lip. Jyn responded with equal passion, hooking her arms around his neck and pressing their bodies even closer  together, and Cassian groaned when he felt the heat radiating from her core so close to his already hardened length. He splayed both hands on her back, running them up and down her soft skin while minding every spot that made her twitch or jerk away. He teased at her nipples through the fabric of the breast band with his thumbs, causing Jyn to moan loudly; Cassian used this chance to drag his lips away from hers to the soft skin behind her ears, then down to her neck, sucking marks that he was sure would bloom the next day. He finally unhooked the breast band, then ran his fingers once again through the pert nipples, switching between gentle squeezes and stroking at the sides, and Jyn moaned again right into his ear.

The sound ignited Cassian, and he felt _alive_.

He gasped when she suddenly pushed him with unexpected power, causing him to drop unceremoniously into the bed. Jyn immediately followed suit, kissing him hard as she moved to straddle him and press her already slick entrance along his length. The sensation as she sank in overwhelmed his senses so much that Cassian slammed his head into the mattress while biting back the inhuman noise he would’ve made if gone unchecked. Jyn braced her hands on either side of his head and started moving her hips, small gasps escaping her as she found the right amount of friction and pressure that left her arms shaking. Cassian watched her intently, putting his own pleasure aside to let the erotic sight entrance him: Jyn, _his Jyn_ , was gradually losing control over the climax that was slowly building up. Her hair had come loose out of its bun, and she shut her eyes tightly, focusing, and Cassian could hear the bed sheet ruffling around him from her grip. He was so aroused and so hard it almost bordered on painful, and she was all wet over him. Cassian grit his teeth and groaned when Jyn increased her speed, chasing for completion, and his hands instinctively went to her hips to aid her, adding more force to her movement. He was desperate to make her come, desperate to see her come undone thanks to him; he could see that she was close, _so close_ , and high-pitched noises came out from her agape mouth…

Her arms gave in, and she came, hard, gasping loudly before she dropping her head to the crook of his neck, crying into his skin as the waves hit her.

Cassian held her tightly, running his hands up and down her back until Jyn came down from her high and the shuddering reduced to tingles. She pushed herself up again to look at him, smiling as she moved her hips after finding that he was still hard. Jyn ran a finger along the outer edges of his face, her eyes following its trail it left and _Force_ , it took Cassian every ounce self-control he had left not to come right then and there just from the intensity of her gaze and the softness in her eyes. Her finger then stopped at his jaw, where she gripped at his chin and tilted his head before whispering harshly, hungrily:

“Fuck me. Hard. _Now_.”

Cassian growled as he let go of the last bits of control he had left and secured his arms around her and flipped them over. He adjusted their position, hovering above her with one hand beside her waist and the other on his length, guiding himself back inside. Both of them gasped as he pushed through her slick entrance, filling her, until he was completely sheathed and could go no further. He shifted his now free hand to the spot below the back of her knees for purchase, and Jyn responded by hooking her legs around his waist, pressing at his bottom with her heels while her fingers clawed at his back.

He paused at that position for few seconds, giving her the time to adjust and himself to regain balance before he started moving. It was slow and measured at first- his eyes searched hers for any sign of discomfort. What he found instead was desire, a need inside her brilliant green eyes, and, as if reading his mind, Jyn nodded and gasped, “Cassian, harder... _please._ ”

That was all he needed to hear, and he thrusted deeper, faster, _harder_ into her until her soft sighs turned into loud moans. Cassian shifted his hips, trying different angles, hitting her at different spots, watching every single expression she made at the changes. The bed started to creak in protest beneath them, and the latticed bed head created a steady banging noise against the wall.

At one slight change of angle Jyn suddenly cried out and her head fell back into the pillow under it while her eyes shut tightly, her eyebrows knotted and mouth agape as she produced a ragged moan and _there it was_ . Cassian took a second to readjust his position so that he could hit that spot again better, shifting his hand to her waist to keep _her_ in place before pulling out- but not completely out- before pushing back inside her with one hard thrust.

Jyn made the same erotic, near-frustrated noises as he hit her spot again and again, fighting to keep her eyes open by looking down at where their bodies met, but every time she did so, she would end up banging her head back into the pillow, practically _wailing_ from the intense pleasure. Cassian could feel the sweat on his back from all the hard work, and the muscles on his thighs and upper arms began to strain, but he couldn’t stop, _wouldn’t_ stop, not when Jyn was coming undone beneath him, and certainly not while knowing she had another orgasm left in her.

Jyn’s moans filled the room, and one of her hands flung to the headboard, gripping hard at one of the bars. Her other hand clawed even harder but slipped on his sweaty back; Cassian was sure it would leave marks that wouldn’t disappear for _weeks-_ but he honestly didn’t care. He kept thrusting harder and deeper into her, and he could faintly feel Jyn clench tighter as she became slicker around him, and when she spoke again, stuttering his name, it ratched up his own pleasure in an unexpected speed, so intense that he almost broke when she heard him say it:

“C-cass... _oh, fuck_ , Cassian…”

The hand he used for support hit the same bar of the headboard. His self-control continued to slip with each forceful thrust. The protested noises from the bed were getting louder now, but all Cassian could hear was his own name, repeated over and over again in Jyn’s feverish pitch. He could feel it, he knew she was so _, so close_ , and he desperately wanted to reach the peak with her, gritting his teeth and squeezing his eyes tight to force himself to hold back for just a moment longer. He lowered his head to give Jyn a quick kiss, and then, with their foreheads pressed together, he used the last remaining energy he had left to plead.

“Come with me,” Cassian whispered hoarsely, “ _Come with me, Jyn._ ”

She did, once again, with a shout; harder and more intense than before, clenching tight and pulsing around him that Cassian gave in only a split second later with a ragged groan- every muscle on his body burned and his vision turned white he saw all the stars in the galaxy. It wasn’t long until they came down from the high, gasping for air, and he collapsed onto her chest, where her arms immediately wrapped him as they quieted. He barely remembered pulling out of her, or pulling the blanket over their overheated bodies before sleep starting to consume him.

It was then that it hit him: _He didn’t want the night to end._

Despite his best effort to stay awake, the gentle stroke of Jyn’s hands on his hair lulled him into deep slumber, feeling safe and actually warm for the first time since the night he learned that Jyn left him on a year-long mission. The last thing he registered was his own arms clutched onto Jyn’s shoulder to make sure she stayed with him for the night.

 

-

Cassian woke up with a jolt, bolting upright while frantically reaching out beside him.

He was alone.

The room was still dark, and so was the sky outside his window.

 _No, no, no_ , he panicked, mind and heart racing, cursing at his own sloppiness- how could he let himself fall asleep knowing that she could have (and would have) disappeared so easily, slipping through his fingers like sands, and...

He was so sure that Jyn had gone until he caught the sound of water coming from the ‘fresher on the other side of the room, and Cassian finally let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

 _She stayed_.

He closed his eyes, clearing his head from the earlier emotional roller-coaster that left him breathless. _Funny_ , Cassian chuckled to himself- he was so used to waking up with an empty bed before- but it all changed since that fateful night with Jyn. Out of all the times people closest to him had left, hers always seemed to leave a fresh wound that wouldn’t close no matter how much time had passed in between. Then again, there was no one like her before; he was never...involved with a person on such a level before ( _almost dying together_ was a level he still didn’t dare to say out loud), but he refused to complain about it because at this point Cassian couldn’t imagine his life without Jyn in it anymore.

The last thought snapped him back to the present, and he murmured a series of curses for wasting precious time as he got up to walk towards the ‘fresher. It was quiet inside save from the sounds of the shower, and Cassian hesitated at first before raising his hand to knock at the door. She didn’t answer, but he could almost sense her turn towards the door, waiting.

“Can I come in?” he asked softly, and it was another bout of silence before she responded.

“Yes,”

When he stepped in, Jyn was already standing at one end of the small space, staring at him with an impassive face. Her hair was still loose from its bun, drenched, and she was holding herself to keep warm despite the cool air that came in as he opened the door. Too tired to start guessing at what her stance and expression might mean, Cassian shut the door behind him and immediately stepped under the shower, letting the warm water hit his face and wash away all the sore muscles and restless thoughts from his mind.

“Come here,” he said, holding out a hand until she joined him in the shower. The next minutes felt like forever as they quietly delved themselves into bathing each other, taking turns to spread the soap across their bodies, and Cassian found that he liked this, taking care of her in the simplest manner while enjoying the chance to map out her skin with his hands.It was something he’d never done before, letting someone touch all his physical imperfections, nor did he ever have the opportunity to do the same for others, not even for someone close. It was surprisingly _calming_ to feel someone like this in a non-sexual manner. He took a quick peek at the kyber dangling from his neck and prayed that they’ll have more chances to do this again, and again, and again, in a kinder universe he hoped they’ll get to live long enough to see.

When the bubbles and soap were washed clean, they stood there in silence, not wanting the peace to end just yet. Jyn’s eyes were fixed to the spot between his collarbone, swallowing visibly and looking unsure while the droplets run through her eyelashes. Oh, how he wished he could just take her by the hand and bring her to his ship and take her back home to Yavin. How he wished things between them were that _simple_.

“Hey,” Cassian gently nudged at her chin with his finger so that their gazes met, offering a small smile which Jyn returned in kind, “I’m uh...I’m sorry that I went out of my mission course and looked for you,” he offered.

To his surprise, Jyn’s smile went wider and she scoffed, “Honestly I expect nothing less from your stubbornness,” She giggled, and Cassian wished he could bottle that sound and keep it for himself. “But thank you,” she continued, her face softened and she raised one hand to brush a loose hair from in his eyes, “For being the one brave enough to come and find me first. I wish I could be the one who did that, but--”

Her words faltered when Cassian bent down to close the distance by pressing his lips against hers. He smiled into the kiss when he felt her melt almost immediately, so glad for her finally letting him in just like that, and they stayed that way for a while, just _kissing_ under the slow drizzle of the shower, as her arms clung to his nape and his hands splayed her back.

It was Jyn who pulled away first this time, but only so far as to plant a quick kiss before resting her chin on his shoulder. Her fingers moved down to draw lazy lines on his shoulder blades, and Cassian followed suit, dropping his head to her shoulder and let the universe revolve around them just a second.

Nothing could prepare him for what she was about to say.

“I love you, Cassian,” she murmured into his skin, almost unheard under the drizzle, but loud enough to him, “...more than anything.”

Cassian almost choked from the emotional burst on his chest.

He shut his eyes and tightened his grip on her, letting the words sink in until he could recover and speak up again. Even then, he was lost as to _how_ and _what_ to say to her because yes, he loved her, had loved her since he met her and always would, but there weren’t enough words to fully convey how he felt, and he didn’t want to waste any time saying things that could prove meaningless to her.

So Cassian kept to the one thing he always prayed for.

“Come home,” he said. _It doesn’t have to be now; she doesn’t need to promise him anything; just…_ “Come home to me.”

Jyn didn’t say anything in response, but she nodded and tightened her arms around him. _That would be enough_. It should be enough.

 _For now_.

 

She was gone when Cassian woke up in the morning and he reached out to find the bed empty yet again.

This time, however, he looked at the empty half of the bed with a smile and a full heart.

 _Some day. One day_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credits for [Char](https://sleepykalena.tumblr.com/) for the endless support both personally and fandomly :*
> 
> Partly inspired by [this NSFW gifset](https://lackinprivacy.tumblr.com/post/160917848317) because _why the hell not_.
> 
> The shower part was inspired by the ending scene of Like Crazy because it's beautiful.


	5. Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A parting gift from Cassian which have more meaning that what's written.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For meme: **Who initiated the first kiss**

If Cassian Andor could be grateful for anything that was an immediate consequence of the fateful Scarif mission is that he finally can feel what it’s like to have something _steady_ in his daily life. Ever since he joined the Rebellion before he even understood what the very word means, his life has been jumping or being thrown from one uncertainty to the next. And the higher his rank goes, the worst it has even get. Checking the time has never been that necessary in his line of work so it was quite a new thing to get used to when he was given his first strict schedule that was post-Scarif-surgeries physical therapy.

(He was bad at it at first, always preferring the fast solution the painkiller could provide, but with a combination of glares, yells, and actual dragging from those he surprisingly consider close to him, he managed to get into the routine.)

By the time his therapy has ended and he was cleared to get back off-planet works, Cassian’s appreciation for time has also improved and he no longer considers on-base, desk jobs as mundane and less-involving than other missions. His overall metabolism had also improved (as Kay repeatedly informs him) and it could only be possible due to the more steady meal time Cassian has now developed.

Another thing that has also  _routinely_ improved was the friendship-or-whatever it is he has with the rest of Rogue One--and especially with Jyn.

He could always expect to see her in the cantina at lunchtimes when she’s not out for missions, and Cassian found a new sense of comfort from it--knowing what to expect at a certain place during a certain place, constantly, despite any odds that should have come in between. They talked more and more as well, throwing jokes and picking each others’ habits (though Jyn surprisingly is move observant than him, a man working as intelligence) and lately, Cassian has been having this strange feeling that they could have been _more_ than what they already are now.

His newfound respect for time has also made him easily irritated when things don’t go according to plan.

Which was why he was _baffled_ when couldn’t find Jyn in the cantina and instead, when he walked into the Command Room, he caught parts of conversation between Draven and the Princess that has something along the line of ‘ _Erso’s first long mission without the rest of Rogue One_ ’.

Which was also the reason he immediately grabbed an ownerless datapad lying closest to him after the Princess purposely mentioned that ‘ _Erso’s ship will leave in about 15 minutes_ ’ and fast-walk himself towards the hangar because he has not yet being allowed to bloody _run_.

Cassian reached the hangar exactly the minute he estimated he would be (and no, he definitely did _not_ constantly checking at the clock on the datapad), continuing down the path through rows of X-wings and Y-wings until he found the only ship (suddenly) scheduled to leave for that day. He let out a sigh of relief when he caught a glimpse of Jyn walking around the U-wing she’s about to board, watching the necessary supply being loaded without any sign of being in a rush--which means he got time for a goodbye of sorts.

And yet, that’s also when his back gave up from the fast walk and a painful sting spread like lightning from his lower back down through the nerves and muscles of his feet and Cassian let out a muffled growl while wobbling to hold onto the nearest thing for support.

“ _Kriffing damn it_ ,” he muttered frustratingly as he bent his body to minimize the pain, praying that the one person he hoped did not notice him so close to falling unceremoniously to the floor, indeed, did not notice.

“Hey, you okay?”

_But of course she did._

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Cassian straightened up slowly, “Just the usual lower back pain,” he added with a reassuring smile, which was not reciprocated.

“Have you been running? You know Doctor Kalonia said you shouldn’t be,” Now standing with both arms crossed in front of her chest, Jyn raised an eyebrow at him accusingly as her eyes skimmed him from head to boots and back.

“I’m not,” _He did_. Jyn shook her head--something she’d started doing as an inaudible response for his stubbornness, but time is running thin so Cassian immediately distract the conversation and pointed at the ship behind her, “You’re leaving.”

(It was supposed to be a question.)

Jyn’s brows unfurled and her arms suddenly uncrossed. Instead of following the direction of his sight, she is now staring at her boots with a heavy sigh, nodding slowly, before meeting his eyes again, “As a matter of fact, I am.”

“Recon mission, I assume?” (He already knew the answer.)

“That, and other stuff,” she replied with a shrug, slipping her hands into her trouser pockets.

“And you will be going for some time, yeah?”

Jyn nodded tentatively, and then her eyebrows were scrunched again, “Why, is there any change of plan?” she eyed on the datapad Cassian didn’t even remember still holding, “Which is why you’re here, right?”

“Wha--oh, no! No, the plan remains the same,”

“Then why are you here?”

_Because you will be away for six months and Force knows whether you would actually return, Jyn Erso._

“You, uh, you missed lunch,” Cassian knew it was the worst excuse as soon as it was said, and now he could only watch as Jyn tried her best to contain her laughter, so much that her cheeks went red.

“You came all the way here,” she accentuated every words, “..running, with risk of injuring your back again, just to remind me that _I missed lunch_? I don’t see you bring any for me to take away either,”

 _Well,_ kriff _, he forgot about that one._

The original plan was just to bid her farewell and maybe saying something along the line of ‘take care’ or ‘you better come back in one piece because I will be waiting and will make sure you do so’--yet there he is, Captain Cassian Andor of the Rebel intelligence, holding a datapad that was used only to show him time and nothing else--against the consistent, observing eyes of Jyn Erso.

 _Or maybe he_ actually _brought something to her_.

“Actually,” Cassian said impassively in a last attempt to save his face, “I do...have something to give you,” Quickly but not yet frantically, he put down the datapad to reach into the hidden pocket sewn on the inner side of the jacket he was wearing and pulled out a small, palm-sized token, careful as to keep it hidden just yet from Jyn, weighing it for a second before staring back to the greens he would soon missed to see.

“Give me your hand,” he invited. In front of him, Jyn’s eyes widened as she looked at him with child-like curiosity, gazing interchangeably between his enclosed palm and his face that only made him want to keep her from leaving even more.

“Is it…” she waited two full seconds before stretching her right hand between them with open palm, where Cassian placed the token gently onto it and covering her hand with his to close her fingers around the token.

It was the most intimate physical contact they have ever made, one that under any other condition none of them would be dare enough to make and Cassian thought he could actually feel Jyn’s body jolted when their skin met, which he equals by not being able to hear anything except his heart drumming right on his ears.

They stayed like that for a brief moment, both eyes fixed on their overlapping hands, before Jyn eventually pulled hers to open her palm and stare at the token.

“It’s yours,” she peered at him between her eyelashes, the fingers from her other hand had joined the others to gently caress the green-blueish surface of the stone.

“Well, yeah,” Cassian responded, plainly confused.

“I mean, it’s your _thing_. Just like this to me,” Jyn quickly added, tapping lightly at her chest where the kyber would have laid hanging from the cord around her neck.

“Oh,” he was not prepared for her to actually know what it was and unexpected heat suddenly crept to his face, “Yeah, it is...how do you know?”

Jyn shrugged but didn’t meet his eyes, “Saw you holding it or just gazing into it several times when you thought no one was looking.” _He swore he’d make sure no one notice him during those moments_. “And I think I heard you said it once that it was from your late mother.” _He could also swore on her mother’s grave that he never told that to anyone_.

“So...what do you want me to do with it?” she eventually asked, sparing them both from the awkward silence.

“Just, you know, keep it safe until you return,” Cassian replied almost too casually, still could not keep his eyes from staring at the way Jyn toys with the token like it’s the most precious things in the world, and how she smoothes her thumbs over and over again through the carvings that were on one side of the stone.

“It it like a lucky charm?” Jyn asked again.

“More like a reminder,”

“Of what?”

Cassian smiled, knowing exactly that what he’s going to say would edge her curiosity, “It’s written there,”

“But I don’t know what it means,” she complained, her lips went thin which was a clear sign that she was intrigued.

It was supposed to be _better_ goodbye, one that he planned carefully during the run he made from the Command Room to the hangar, but then again, there was nothing between him and Jyn that was ‘according to plan’. He didn’t plan on empathizing with her and her cause, he didn’t plan on going on a rogue mission with her to Scarif; _hell_ , he didn’t even plan on both of them to survive and have a second chance at knowing each other better but there they are now.

So instead of a goodbye, Cassian took one step closer towards her personal space and wrap both of his hands around hers, once again securing the stone under her fingers, before leaning even _closer_ into the pull they always had to each other and said with a small smile, “I think you do.”

He then released her hands and backed away slowly, keeping their gaze held for as long as he could and added, “I’ll see you again here in six months, alright?”

The last thing Cassian saw before turning his body was Jyn shoving the token inside one of her pockets, and despite having never been a spiritual kind of person, he nevertheless clings to the hope that the token will indeed keep her somewhat _safer_.

***

To say that Jyn was happy to finally see the green planet that is Yavin IV again is an understatement: she was _thrilled_ to be bac to a familiar place where she knows exactly where to go and who to find at any relevant occasion.

The mission was a success and everyone kept saying that she would be praised and even possibly got promoted for what she’d done during the mission, but Jyn couldn’t care less about that. She had another achievement in mind that she needs to share with one particular person that matters the most.

The U-wing landed smoothly and everyone on board took their time to joke at the pilot for not forgetting how to land a ship on even, paved ground after six months of horrid terrain and difficult landing. Jyn snapped back to herself after staring out the window when she hears the familiar hiss of the ramp opening, Yavin’s humid air immediately welcomes her and the rest of the team as they groaned and sighed and stretched their bodies while walking towards the hangar.

Echo Base was busy as always, with Rebels buzzing here and there, each with their own businesses to mind that made their return rather ignored, yet as soon as Jyn was under the shadow of the hangar, she caught the sight of _him_.

Right there, in the exact same place he bid her farewell six months ago, next to the exact same crate, was Cassian Andor, smiling at her --and this she can be sure of as he is never a particularly smiley person--and it grows even wider the closer her steps brought them together. Her eyes went instictly to skim his entire physique, which Jyn then found stupid a split second later because it was not him who actually needed to be checked out.

So she brought her gaze back to his eyes, greens meet browns, and it was something about the way he smiled the way Cassian stared at her that keeps her going until she is within his personal space, their bodies merely inches apart in that vast hangar.

“Sergeant Erso,” he greeted her in such courtesy that Jyn’s immediate reaction was letting out an ugly snort, “I see you back in one piece.”

“Captain Andor,” she returned the gesture before making an inaudible ‘oh’ face and rummaged her hand into one of her pockets and pulling out the stone token he gave her. “It wasn’t easy, but guess what, I figured it out,” Jyn added, lifting the stone up and brushing her thumb through the carved side.

“Is that so?” Cassian looked visibly amused, but not surprised. Between mission and occasional routine of leaving coded messages for each other, there were times when Jyn really considered to update him on her painstaking process of ‘figuring it out’. Because not only that the language was something entirely new to her, she never knew before that Festian also have their own set of alphabet--hence doubling her total effort to find the correct meaning of the carvings.

(It didn’t help either with the fact that the last letter was nearly disappeared, which makes her initial translation result so bizzare. More than once she also considered just plainly ask him for the meaning, or whether the inscription reads ‘ _innikh dê_ ’ or ‘ _innikh dl_ ’.)

But then, after one awful recon gone bad, they may or may not had revealed their true feelings for each other in a panicked message Jyn had initiated when adrenaline still rushing through her blood, so--added with the knowledge of the meaning of the stone token Cassian gave her, she wanted nothing but to hear those words out loud from him now.

“Yes, I did,” Jyn replied giddily, couldn’t even contain the grin from her face any longer, “So...here I am,” she took another step closer.

“And?” Just like before, Cassian gravitated towards her and he leaned down, their faces almost touching and none of them even cared who sees anymore.

“What are you waiting for, Captain?” Jyn’s smile widened, and she could feel his nose bumping with hers, his hands on her waist and craning her chin; feel his whole body pressed to ehrs, and she closed her eyes to focus on his words.

“Welcome home,” was what Cassian whispered before he kissed her, and Jyn knows that she _finally_ is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credits for [Char](http://sleepykalena.tumblr.com) and [Mel](http://skitzofreak.tumblr.com) and [Jojo](http://crazy-fruit.tumblr.com/) for helping with exploring the idea.
> 
> This piece is inspired by that one interraction between Kili the dwarf and Tauriel the elf from The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies. I don't really ship them but I like the dialogue as it has a strong Rebelcaptain feels in it. Aaand, credits again for the people above for avoiding me from turning this fic into something angsty :P
> 
> So the stone token Cassian gave Jyn is _kinda_ similar to Kili's rune stone in the movie, given by his mother. The inscription is indeed "innikh dê" in Khuzdul (Tolkien's dwarvish language) which translates to "return to me". 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy the fluff-I-have-not-written-in-ages! Come yell to me on [Tumblr](http://grexigone.tumblr.com) too!


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